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Writer's picturealandgaff

Snail Mail

On January 5 we received a Christmas card that had been postmarked December 2. It was correctly addressed and sent from an address exactly 9.41 miles from our home.


A swift use of a calculator reveals that that USPS just barely beat out the pace of an average garden snail if the snail moved at top speed for 34 days, did not stop to sleep, and avoided all bathroom breaks.


Service like this is appalling. I’m almost embarrassed to cash my Civil Service retirement checks.

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